Tokai has been conquered

In what has evidently been my most treacherous, harrowing mission yet, I went to Tokai this morning to get you these pictures. Throwing caution to the wind and entering gates that had no entry signs on them, I risked my life. I also risked the Ebola virus, Congo fever, bird flu and altitude sickness to bring you these views.

What I did not get a photo of was this eagle/hawk type looking bird. I see it every time I am there, on the exact same rock but whenever I get near it flies away. Clearly it knows danger when it sees it.

I got a nice picture of Hout Bay (Or as Afrikaners from up country call it “Wood Bay” They translate it into English for their English friends) When I took that photo I thought to myself “It’s early in the morning, the beach is empty, I bet some foreign models are tanning topless” I’m going to check it out later.

As you can see the gates were clearly marked with no entry signs but I live life on the edge everyday so I bust through them like a man possessed. I had to dodge fire from land, sea and air from the SANDF but I survived, like true heroes do.

You will also notice a photo of a winding road, very similar to the Tour de France, only I’m a better rider. I mean that’s quite clear I think.

There is also a photo of myself just gazing over the land and admiring all that I have conquered. I caught myself off guard taking that photo, promise I was not posing.

Then some other news. On the way back I saw the same guy on Edinburgh Drive. Today he was selling an umbrella made out of that shit material (Like the material that makes fishnet curtains that some people insist on having in their houses). It also had no handle. So I don’t know what the fuck it was for. Clearly it’s no help if it’s raining or if the sun is shining, so I am now convinced he has been sipping the original formula absinthe, the one that makes you crazy. Oh, and he also asked for one cent again. Lay off the crack dude.

What a day, what a day.