Yesterdays language in “Ronge sends a pearler” was just fucking terrible. So today it will be toned down but it was necessary yesterday because I was in such a state of shock.
After being so shocked at Barry “Tower Rounder” Ronge in yesterdays column, I thought I would give it a rest and go back to the Sunday Times magazine today and try read the rest. Well well…seems I found more stuff. Amazing that this magazine has given me so much to write about. I could fill the whole week with articles plucked from that magazine. Here is what I found today.
Intrigued by TR’s (Tower Rounders) use of dirty language, I decided to read his article in the magazine. Barry was talking about PVR recorders and said “Another important weapon (That’s an overstatement TR, it’s just a decoder) in this audience liberation struggle is the Portable Video Recorder (PVR)…”
I think it’s Personal Video Recorder TR. I mean look at the thing, does it look portable to you? Do you just pack up your decoder (Not to mention your satellite dish) and head off for the weekend? TR, you have an addiction to pharmaceuticals of some sort, I know it. Then in a sidebar in his column it says of YouTube: “The statistics are astounding. One hundred million film clips are viewed daily on YouTube…” I read in Time magazine that YouTube has 100 million videos in its database and not that 100 million are viewed daily, because that’s a fuck load. Hey I may be wrong but I just thought I would mention it.
Then onto an advert in the magazine for Sunday Times Books. Christmas is supposed to be a happy time where kids play in the street and the sound of drug fuelled laughter fills the air. But clearly the people who chose this week’s books read TR’s work and were seriously depressed. The first book, and these are all labelled “Christmas specials”, is “Bodies of evidence: Forensic science and crime” On the cover of the book is a dead body covered by a sheet. Charming stuff. Another book is “Conspiracy Encyclopedia” which sounds light hearted. Another book is “When a crocodile eats the sun” It is “the story of the disintegration of a family…” Mmmm, the type of present you would expect to find under the Christmas tree.
Then in the review of DVD’s, Neil Sonnekus gave Failure to Launch one star. I thought the movie was perfectly OK. But that’s my view and he has his view. What I did notice was a typical movie reviewer line where he talks about the chemistry between Matthew McConaughey and Sarah Jessica Parker. He says “but there is about as much romantic frisson between these two good and attractive actors as two suburban lampposts” Do reviewers always have to try be funny? I guess it’s better than the “I would have rather watched paint dry” joke (Ha ha it’s seriously funny once you’ve heard it like…3 billion times) If one more person uses that line, ever, I think I will go mad. But yeah, I managed to cough out a laugh at his joke in between trying to choke myself.
The only fun things were the cartoons. Well done Sunday Times, you are really giving the kids something to look forward to for Christmas.
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