Our sunglasses offer 100% non-UV protection

As Clicks sunglasses give us welders arc-eye

I have always insisted on the best sunglasses for my eyes, not because I’m a royal pompous prick, but because I don’t like UV burning my retina like a hot poker. My Oakley Monster Dogs have actually increased my vision to the legendary 20/20 status. I wear them everywhere except for my bike. For that I choose Dragon Rake which kick ass as well. My sister however, opts for Clicks and Spitfire. Clearly an elementary school error this. I once wore a pair of Spitfire sunglasses and after about 20 minutes my eyes started getting sore because of the distortion of the lens. How people wear this shit all year round is a mystery. So when next you see a little punk kid on the beach with a pair of Aviators (other than the legendary Ray Bans) you can laugh. Because while he thinks he’s cool now on the beach with a light cigarette dangling out his mouth and some 16 year old slapper whore on his arm, he is sure to have two glass eyes by the 2010 World Cup.

If you look at the photo above you will notice a good few cracks in the lenses of my sister’s sunglasses. I think if you click on the photo you will get a bigger picture. The cracks have formed in a circular fashion. Well she did not leave them in the oven, she left them in the sun. Now I don’t know about you, but if I were a sunglasses designer I would make sure they could withstand their natural environment, namely the sun. I would not give a fuck if they can survive underwater, in space, in a pressure chamber under the earth, or in the freezing cold. I would just design them so they withstand the sun. But clearly the guys who make Click’s sunglasses don’t think the same as I do. Which is most odd. They were in the sun on Tuesday for half an hour and they cracked. Quality, quality stuff Click’s are selling. No wonder Click’s can afford to give people Clubcard points, because they mark everything up to be more expensive than any other shop on the planet. Every single thing in Click’s can be bought cheaper if you just look around for two minutes. So these sunglasses, which should clearly be free, or maybe 50cents, are being sold for about R120. Fuckers. Why not just spend R800 or so and get a decent pair that will last forever? Crazy times.