Movie reviewers

These “crits” as they call themselves have jobs that no one actually cares about. I would compare them to professional food tasters. Actually I think they are ex food tasters who have already had 10 heart attacks and are just waiting for the first plastic heart and artery system to be invented so they can get back to eating shit and not worry about heart attacks. They sit like little Buddha’s in the movie theatre eating popcorn at the rate of 10000 pieces a minute. Then they watch the film and criticize the hell out of it, even though it was a good film. Scary Movie happens to be one of the greatest teenage comedies of all time but these old fools give it a bad rating. They only give it a bad review because they are 200 years old and lost their sense of humour during the Great Depression. That was also the last time they had a real job. Now they earn a living from watching movies for free. So they can take their little “crit” notepads, their oversized popcorn, their large sugar-inducing-coma Coca Cola and piss off.