Friday, February 09, 2007

BAR-B-Q sauce that bee-hind


This is the bum I am talking about. I was just sent this by a friend, Mike. This photo perfectly illustrates what I look for in a woman, and what I don't. All in one picture, you say? Yes. Look at Jessice Biel. Notice her ass(Yes it is looking big, but it's good. And those photos always make it look bigger. But I bet it's harder than diamonds. I'm thinking "spit roast" right about now) I don't know what I just wrote in brackets, I blacked out on roofies.

Now notice her legs. Yes, athletic. Yes yes yes to everything about them. Then notice the legs in the background. This is where the "That is not what I want" part of my story comes in. Call me mean, call me cruel. Fuck it, if you look like Jessica Biel, or in fact are Jessica Biel, just call me. Slap me around and call me your filthy cabana boy who is in need of much cleaning and punishment. Call me on my cellphone. For the love of God, just call me...

No comments: