This women is fucked in the head

I love that headline

There is an article in the YOU magazine(Not mine, naturally) and it's about dogs and giving them special treats. The article starts off as follows:

Riff-Raff's mouth starts to water as he talks about his food(This article was already starting to lose me over here-Sean) “I love boiled chicken, not overdone, on rice with vegetables,” the five year old Husky says.”Green beans, carrots and butternut. I'm not mad about dog biscuits. Roast beef-that's my favourite.”

Riff Raff belongs to Jenny Shone of Walkerville, south of Johannesburg. She's conducting a telepathic interview with him especially for YOU.

FUCK. ME. From the magazine that is the home Of Joost and Amor(Who are probably more irritating than this fucking dog whisperer) and these days Minki and all the guys she hooks up with, this is seriously scraping around the whore house for a story. Every time Minki picks some new guy, she gets in the YOU magazine. Talk about desperate. Now this dog whisperer is clearly desperate as well.

Anyway, this story is even a new low for YOU magazine. You can't for one second, Jenny, tell me that you can hear your dogs speaking. Because, unless you are currently attached to a Tik bulb, you will realise DOGS DONT SPEAK. Don't try be fucking clever and try make me believe that what you do is not a scam. I know YOU magazine in only R10,95, and therefore might not cater for the most intelligent people, but you can't even fool the dumb with this bullshit. This is budget journalism. Jenny, can I ask you what I'm thinking right now? Oh you don't know? Well let me let you in on my thoughts.

You're a psychotic mad person crack head, who every once in a while needs to leave the house and realise there is a whole world out there. A world full of intelligent people that know that you are trying to screw them over. Seriously, just because your rubbish is in a magazine, does not make it true. But it does make you an A class con artist(In your mind)

In my mind you are cooked in the head. Some of my friends smoke more weed than Willie Nelson, and even they will realise that you are not for real. In my mind, you are a crack addict.

I can't believe this story actually appeared in a magazine. Oh, Jenny, FedEx me some of that crack you smoking, that shit is whack.