Why the FUCK can I not post a photo on this blogger thing? It's highly irritating me and I was looking at a takeover of Google, but if they can't sort out their "Blogger" site, I might just stop the transfer. Oh well, that means I will have $10 billion more in my bank account. However shall I spend it?
To new readers, that was a joke, I'm not really that rich. Currently my bank manager is telling me that I am IN something called "debt" Never heard of it. I'm waiting for the day that he tells me that I am IN Gisele Bundchen, the worlds top earning supermodel. Paste this link: http://www.news24.com/News24/Entertainment/Celebrities/0,,2-1225-2108_2149302,00.html
Apologies for not directly linking this, but Blogger is toy-toying with my head by not working.
Anyway, I don't really know what to say which is the reason for me sitting up by myself, with a Black Horse and coke. Oh you don't know Black Horse? Well it's vodka, R32,50 a bottle. They also make cane, gin and vodka. All R32,50 a bottle. Available at the bottle store near Coimbra, near Kenilworth in Cape Town. Probably wrecks your body, but makes you feel happy nonetheless. I'm at top speed right now.
So I was thinking, what makes a good vodka? I mean, there is shit at Makro for like R150 a bottle. But really, after 2 drinks(I'm a feather weight) I can't tell the difference between vodka and horse jizz. At Tiger Tiger I have one double vodka and creme soda and I can't tell the difference between right and wrong, and often find myself ogling 16 year olds. Clearly wrong...but with that drink...oooooh so right! Anyway...I should keep that on the down low.
As I ramble on I forget what I came here to write. This heartburn is killing me so I think I will pop to my medicine cabinet and in between the tik and acid...and rohypnol and eye drops...and beaver tranquilizers...I will quietly drink an entire bottle of Gaviscon to douse this fire in my heart. It's burning so much...but that could be from a broken heart after I realised that no one really loves me. Shit....life is a bitch...and then you become fuck off rich and the people who laughed at you suddenly want to hang out with you and touch you and be your friend and help you and let everyone know that you know them...well you get the point.
Shit tonight is hectic.
I'm thinking of a huge party tomorrow night but my wingman has left for Port Alfred until next week and because I am the youngest child I am very shy and too nervous to speak to girls(This is a well known trait of youngest children...being shy) and I...I need another Black Horse. Shit, I really need a wingman for tomorrow night at Tiger. I don't know how to deal with the masses of woman...and some guys...who flock to touch me, because so many people believe that I am a mystical figure who only exists inside this one dimensional screen on the internet.
So many people actually believe I am fake, it's quite disturbing.
I must post this photo, not to rate or anything, but I was tagged with some fox called Sarah on Facebook. I think the photo was taken at Wadda. She is so hot, pity she never remembers me and looks at me like I have just taken a piss on her new dress when I say hello. Facebook is wonderful, it's like a backup memory for the parts of the night you forget!
I was leaving a message on Shaun Oakes(www.shaunoakes.com) message board vibe, when I was replying to a comment by Annique. Anniques homepage was listed as some sort of dating site, and when I clicked on it, the first mynx I saw was this fox called sweet chilli17. Then, when I just went to news24, there was a thing on the site saying dare to meet me or something. And it was this same fox! I hate internet dating things, it's quite blind. But fook me, this girl is hot. Apparently she is just looking for friends, but she is rather easy on the eye.
Intriguing. You can see her on http://www.love2meet.co.za/s/view/1330053/a/367/
Sorry I can't make a direct link, Blogger is fucked. So am I it seems. Black Horse.
I'm sure I will do another intense post in 10 minutes or so while I go the to Engen to buy another coke
Until them my loved ones
I love all of you
Captain Jack
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
Drunk driving
Wow, today seems to be a day of inspired writing! And for once it's not all rubbish, but I feel quite intelligent today.
I am patting myself on the back
Lovely.
Ok onto the article.
I feel this needs to be said, even though it may be obvious.
Don't drink and drive.
I remember when I was younger and I would hear stories of my older sister and how friends of her friends had been killed in drunk driving accidents. At the time it never really affected me as I was young, too young to drink or even worry about this stuff.
However as I have gotten older, these accidents have just got closer and closer to me. In the past few months I know of two serious accidents where guys were seriously injured, due to drunk/irresponsible driving. The latest story I heard was that a friend of some of my friends was killed on Friday in an accident. This however was not a drunk driving accident. I don't want to go into it as I don't know the whole story, but reckless driving just cannot go on. Maybe Fridays accident was just that, purely an accident, but the point is that someone died. People are getting killed and it seems that it is happening all the time now. Reckless/fast driving is just as deadly as drunk driving.
Personally, in Cape Town, I think the cops have been doing a fine job of clamping down on it, especially outside night clubs. In Claremont I always see police patrolling outside the clubs and on Friday when I was there they even had security walking through the parking area, keeping a check on things. They have gotten so strict that people are too scared to drive, even after one or two drinks, when they may be under the legal limit still. I won't lie, I have driven drunk before, and I bet so have many of us. However, in the past few years my friends and myself have refused to drive drunk. We won't get into a car with drunk drivers and I was chatting to BMP about a mates 21st birthday coming up this Saturday. The party is near BMP's house and the first thing he said was "It's cool to stay at my place in case any of us is too drunk" For us it's become the first thing we think of. "How are we getting home?" BMP even got a lift back home a while back because he was quite spent, and his mom had to drive him back to his car in the morning, after which he went to work! But that's cool, he's a responsible guy for doing that.
And you have to be strict. About two years ago a friend of mine wanted to drive back to Durbanville from my place in Claremont. We wouldn't allow him and he started getting furious with us, that we were questioning his ability to drive. It ended up with him swearing at us because BMP had taken his keys away. Clearly he was drunk, and he later said he was out of line. The point is, you need to be strict. If a mate says he can drive, when he clearly can't, you need to lay down the law. Don't just give up and say "Fine, go ahead, drive if you want"
Because if that friends gets killed on the way home you will never be able to forgive yourself.
With my mates it's known that at any time of the night, if you are too drunk or have missed a lift, give one of us a call and we will pick you up. No problem, that's what friends are for. There are no points, or "hero" status for driving drunk. I think it's a problem in SA, where guys are too "manly" to not drive just because they are drunk. To me it screams more of "immaturity" if someone wants to drive drunk.
The situation is getting bad though, and there is only so much the cops can do. We need to be responsible for our own actions, the traffic police are not there to hold our hands every second of the day.
So be safe.
I am patting myself on the back
Lovely.
Ok onto the article.
I feel this needs to be said, even though it may be obvious.
Don't drink and drive.
I remember when I was younger and I would hear stories of my older sister and how friends of her friends had been killed in drunk driving accidents. At the time it never really affected me as I was young, too young to drink or even worry about this stuff.
However as I have gotten older, these accidents have just got closer and closer to me. In the past few months I know of two serious accidents where guys were seriously injured, due to drunk/irresponsible driving. The latest story I heard was that a friend of some of my friends was killed on Friday in an accident. This however was not a drunk driving accident. I don't want to go into it as I don't know the whole story, but reckless driving just cannot go on. Maybe Fridays accident was just that, purely an accident, but the point is that someone died. People are getting killed and it seems that it is happening all the time now. Reckless/fast driving is just as deadly as drunk driving.
Personally, in Cape Town, I think the cops have been doing a fine job of clamping down on it, especially outside night clubs. In Claremont I always see police patrolling outside the clubs and on Friday when I was there they even had security walking through the parking area, keeping a check on things. They have gotten so strict that people are too scared to drive, even after one or two drinks, when they may be under the legal limit still. I won't lie, I have driven drunk before, and I bet so have many of us. However, in the past few years my friends and myself have refused to drive drunk. We won't get into a car with drunk drivers and I was chatting to BMP about a mates 21st birthday coming up this Saturday. The party is near BMP's house and the first thing he said was "It's cool to stay at my place in case any of us is too drunk" For us it's become the first thing we think of. "How are we getting home?" BMP even got a lift back home a while back because he was quite spent, and his mom had to drive him back to his car in the morning, after which he went to work! But that's cool, he's a responsible guy for doing that.
And you have to be strict. About two years ago a friend of mine wanted to drive back to Durbanville from my place in Claremont. We wouldn't allow him and he started getting furious with us, that we were questioning his ability to drive. It ended up with him swearing at us because BMP had taken his keys away. Clearly he was drunk, and he later said he was out of line. The point is, you need to be strict. If a mate says he can drive, when he clearly can't, you need to lay down the law. Don't just give up and say "Fine, go ahead, drive if you want"
Because if that friends gets killed on the way home you will never be able to forgive yourself.
With my mates it's known that at any time of the night, if you are too drunk or have missed a lift, give one of us a call and we will pick you up. No problem, that's what friends are for. There are no points, or "hero" status for driving drunk. I think it's a problem in SA, where guys are too "manly" to not drive just because they are drunk. To me it screams more of "immaturity" if someone wants to drive drunk.
The situation is getting bad though, and there is only so much the cops can do. We need to be responsible for our own actions, the traffic police are not there to hold our hands every second of the day.
So be safe.
Monday, July 16, 2007
I never lie
Contrary to popular belief, I don't actually lie on this blog. If I did I would make up stories about me doing coke off a dead Filipino hooker. Obviously not Coca Cola, but cocaine...
Anyway it was fairly amusing then that I had an e-mail(An E-MAIL, not even a comment-madness) today questioning whether I had really seen Bryan Habana, Rassie Erasmus and Fourie du Preez at Tiger Tiger the other night.
So I went onto the mynx that I was dancing withs Facebook page and pulled the photo of Fourie off it.
I have the photo on my computer, but for some reason "Blogger" won't allow me to put a photo up. But when it works I will throw it on, as proof.
Until then my people...
Anyway it was fairly amusing then that I had an e-mail(An E-MAIL, not even a comment-madness) today questioning whether I had really seen Bryan Habana, Rassie Erasmus and Fourie du Preez at Tiger Tiger the other night.
So I went onto the mynx that I was dancing withs Facebook page and pulled the photo of Fourie off it.
I have the photo on my computer, but for some reason "Blogger" won't allow me to put a photo up. But when it works I will throw it on, as proof.
Until then my people...
Amstel on my mind
Clever hey? As in "Am still on my mind" Like "Amstel beer is still on my mind" Whatever.
I'm not an advertising guru but as I learn more, as my mind matures, I do actually learn some things along the way in this game of life. I always used to wonder why Coca Cola, of which everyone in the world knows of it, still do advertising? Same with Pick 'n Pay, who always put flyers in my letter box, pretty much constantly. Basically it is to make sure that these companies are fresh in your mind and you never forget them. If they stopped advertising, smaller comapnies could start pumping out the ads, and subconsciously, over time, you would start seeing their logo more in your mind and go shop there. Or something like that.
And so it brings me to the point of Amstel beer, and that they are being quite sneaky. And clever. We all know that Hansa Marzen Gold is basically the competition, and now that there is no Amstel in SA, they are trying to chip into Amstels market dominance. I have seen them doing promotions at places such as Tiger Tiger and I see their boards at Forres in Cape Town. Now while Hansa are a visual presence in bars, Amstel are maintaining their presence in the newspapers. They have ads saying things such as "After reading this ad you will be 15 seconds closer to your next Amstel". Their ads go along those lines. Now it got me thinking. While I don't drink much beer, and if I do I will have a Windhoek, the brand that is the freshest in my mind at the moment is Amstel.
To me this is genius. Here is a beer that is not even currently available, and yet it is still the one being talked about and seen. It's presence seems to be still quite strong in our minds. Hansa on the other hand don't seem to be keeping their presence up, other than by being stocked at various places. And while it is clever that the new Hansa looks like Amstel, did the Hansa crew ever think that people would say "But it's basically the new Amstel" You see, even though they may be drinking Hansa, they still talk about Amstel.
So Amstel is probably being spoken about with nearly every Hansa that is being bought, and this keeps Amstel fresh in everyones minds. So when it returns, people will not ever really think it had disappeared because they were still talking about it. And then, what Amstel hope, is that all their original drinkers will once again turn to Amstel. I have no doubt this will happen.
I think that's all quite clever.
Amstel, you guys impress me.
And once again, we finish off another conversation with the word "Amstel"
Amstel fresh in our minds
Sheer genius
I'm not an advertising guru but as I learn more, as my mind matures, I do actually learn some things along the way in this game of life. I always used to wonder why Coca Cola, of which everyone in the world knows of it, still do advertising? Same with Pick 'n Pay, who always put flyers in my letter box, pretty much constantly. Basically it is to make sure that these companies are fresh in your mind and you never forget them. If they stopped advertising, smaller comapnies could start pumping out the ads, and subconsciously, over time, you would start seeing their logo more in your mind and go shop there. Or something like that.
And so it brings me to the point of Amstel beer, and that they are being quite sneaky. And clever. We all know that Hansa Marzen Gold is basically the competition, and now that there is no Amstel in SA, they are trying to chip into Amstels market dominance. I have seen them doing promotions at places such as Tiger Tiger and I see their boards at Forres in Cape Town. Now while Hansa are a visual presence in bars, Amstel are maintaining their presence in the newspapers. They have ads saying things such as "After reading this ad you will be 15 seconds closer to your next Amstel". Their ads go along those lines. Now it got me thinking. While I don't drink much beer, and if I do I will have a Windhoek, the brand that is the freshest in my mind at the moment is Amstel.
To me this is genius. Here is a beer that is not even currently available, and yet it is still the one being talked about and seen. It's presence seems to be still quite strong in our minds. Hansa on the other hand don't seem to be keeping their presence up, other than by being stocked at various places. And while it is clever that the new Hansa looks like Amstel, did the Hansa crew ever think that people would say "But it's basically the new Amstel" You see, even though they may be drinking Hansa, they still talk about Amstel.
So Amstel is probably being spoken about with nearly every Hansa that is being bought, and this keeps Amstel fresh in everyones minds. So when it returns, people will not ever really think it had disappeared because they were still talking about it. And then, what Amstel hope, is that all their original drinkers will once again turn to Amstel. I have no doubt this will happen.
I think that's all quite clever.
Amstel, you guys impress me.
And once again, we finish off another conversation with the word "Amstel"
Amstel fresh in our minds
Sheer genius
A few thoughts...
...have been bouncing around in my fairly empty head. I thought I would put them on the internet.
There has been a story going around for a while, I'm not sure if it's just in Cape Town, or on the internet, but it's hilarious. I think I heard it from BMP. Basically, some dude was out at a club, or bar, and he was on the toilet, just chilling there minding his own business.
Then some guy comes running into the bathroom about to be sick, slams the first toilet stall door open, and this guy happens to be sitting there, and he gets vomited on. Now the guy who vomited on him obviously did not do this on purpose, but anyway, nervous that the guy on the toilet is going to get pissed off and beat him up, he punches the guy on the toilet in the face! CRAZY! Imagine sitting on the toilet, some guy vomits on you, and then punches you in the face! I don't think I could deal with that, it's so filthy! Well as I say, not sure if it's true. Just imagine this was you...I can't quite cope.
Then another thing that has been bugging me is beggars at the traffic lights. I'm a pretty decent guy, but I cannot stand being asked at literally every single traffic light for money! It's getting pathetic, and I hate having to be nice to these guys at every traffic light. I don't want to have to say more than once "No thanks" I really don't want to have to have a whole story about why I'm not giving these guys money every time my car comes to a standstill.
I know they obviously desperate, but I get quite bleak with them. You always hear stories of people saying that people with money are rude to beggars by not even looking at them, but seriously, some days you are just not in the mood to look at these people. If you drive a car, you get asked the same question maybe 30 times a day if you drive a lot. It gets tedious. It's like a kid asking "Are we there yet?" every 5 minutes in the car. You are bound to snap sometime.
Also, we cannot possibly help every person on the planet. In SA we are expected to pay everywhere we go. Park at a shopping centre, it's like R6 an hour. Park anywhere else, some beggar wants R2. Park somewhere else, a car guard is there. We cannot honestly be expected to pay everyone we see, as it's literally not financially viable.
I honestly think that these car guards at big shopping centres should be paid for by the centres. If I am a paying shopper, safe parking should be a given. If i am going to be parking my car at your centre, I should be safe. I just think this thing of car guards is out of control, and I believe many people pay way too much every month on car guards, and if you think, not too long ago there were no car guards, and most of us got by just fine.
Even worse is the car guards, especially at Spar in Rosmead Avenue, Cape Town, who expect you to pay them when you have literally been there 5 minutes. That's no joke, 5 minutes and they want money. Then when you don't pay them they look at you as though you are a criminal.
It's getting crazy.
Other than that I hope everyone is watching the Tour de France, our Robbie Hunter is doing remarkably well, and I nearly cried the other day when he narrowly missed out on a stage win, coming in 2nd place. We need him to get a win. It's the mountain stages now, but in the final days there will be some more sprints and hopefully he can pull out some serious pace for a win.
Well then...until next time
Oh also...if you are in Cape Town on the 20th January 2008, book a ticket out. I think that is the correct date. To be honest, I'm thinking of leaving for the whole week.
I can't possibly stand to be in the same city as Whore Spice, that one married to Becks. I feel as though Cape Town is being violated by them being here.
What did Cape Town do to deserve this?
Cant they do a tour to Guam? Or the North Pole?
It's heart breaking
There has been a story going around for a while, I'm not sure if it's just in Cape Town, or on the internet, but it's hilarious. I think I heard it from BMP. Basically, some dude was out at a club, or bar, and he was on the toilet, just chilling there minding his own business.
Then some guy comes running into the bathroom about to be sick, slams the first toilet stall door open, and this guy happens to be sitting there, and he gets vomited on. Now the guy who vomited on him obviously did not do this on purpose, but anyway, nervous that the guy on the toilet is going to get pissed off and beat him up, he punches the guy on the toilet in the face! CRAZY! Imagine sitting on the toilet, some guy vomits on you, and then punches you in the face! I don't think I could deal with that, it's so filthy! Well as I say, not sure if it's true. Just imagine this was you...I can't quite cope.
Then another thing that has been bugging me is beggars at the traffic lights. I'm a pretty decent guy, but I cannot stand being asked at literally every single traffic light for money! It's getting pathetic, and I hate having to be nice to these guys at every traffic light. I don't want to have to say more than once "No thanks" I really don't want to have to have a whole story about why I'm not giving these guys money every time my car comes to a standstill.
I know they obviously desperate, but I get quite bleak with them. You always hear stories of people saying that people with money are rude to beggars by not even looking at them, but seriously, some days you are just not in the mood to look at these people. If you drive a car, you get asked the same question maybe 30 times a day if you drive a lot. It gets tedious. It's like a kid asking "Are we there yet?" every 5 minutes in the car. You are bound to snap sometime.
Also, we cannot possibly help every person on the planet. In SA we are expected to pay everywhere we go. Park at a shopping centre, it's like R6 an hour. Park anywhere else, some beggar wants R2. Park somewhere else, a car guard is there. We cannot honestly be expected to pay everyone we see, as it's literally not financially viable.
I honestly think that these car guards at big shopping centres should be paid for by the centres. If I am a paying shopper, safe parking should be a given. If i am going to be parking my car at your centre, I should be safe. I just think this thing of car guards is out of control, and I believe many people pay way too much every month on car guards, and if you think, not too long ago there were no car guards, and most of us got by just fine.
Even worse is the car guards, especially at Spar in Rosmead Avenue, Cape Town, who expect you to pay them when you have literally been there 5 minutes. That's no joke, 5 minutes and they want money. Then when you don't pay them they look at you as though you are a criminal.
It's getting crazy.
Other than that I hope everyone is watching the Tour de France, our Robbie Hunter is doing remarkably well, and I nearly cried the other day when he narrowly missed out on a stage win, coming in 2nd place. We need him to get a win. It's the mountain stages now, but in the final days there will be some more sprints and hopefully he can pull out some serious pace for a win.
Well then...until next time
Oh also...if you are in Cape Town on the 20th January 2008, book a ticket out. I think that is the correct date. To be honest, I'm thinking of leaving for the whole week.
I can't possibly stand to be in the same city as Whore Spice, that one married to Becks. I feel as though Cape Town is being violated by them being here.
What did Cape Town do to deserve this?
Cant they do a tour to Guam? Or the North Pole?
It's heart breaking
Drunk in Claremont? Terrible
I was driving through Rondebosch the other day and saw a newspaper poster on a light pole saying something like "Merryweather was drunk"
For those of you not aware, Andrew Merryweather was beaten up at a petrol station in Claremont and is now paralysed. What is crazy is that the newspapers feel the need to put this up on a sign post. If you read the article, you will see that an attendant at the petrol station testified and said Merryweather was drunk. That's fine.
But the way the newspapers make it come across is that it is a problem that Merryweather was drunk. They will say they are not doing this and are merely reporting the facts. I think the fact that he was drunk is not important at all, not important enough to make it onto newpsaper boards.
This does not necessitate beating someone so badly that they are paralysed. This is bullshit. The kids who beat him up need to harden up and stop hiding behind their rich parents. Because money doesn't buy class, and it should not buy your way out of jail.
Let's see what the trial will make of it.
For those of you not aware, Andrew Merryweather was beaten up at a petrol station in Claremont and is now paralysed. What is crazy is that the newspapers feel the need to put this up on a sign post. If you read the article, you will see that an attendant at the petrol station testified and said Merryweather was drunk. That's fine.
But the way the newspapers make it come across is that it is a problem that Merryweather was drunk. They will say they are not doing this and are merely reporting the facts. I think the fact that he was drunk is not important at all, not important enough to make it onto newpsaper boards.
This does not necessitate beating someone so badly that they are paralysed. This is bullshit. The kids who beat him up need to harden up and stop hiding behind their rich parents. Because money doesn't buy class, and it should not buy your way out of jail.
Let's see what the trial will make of it.
Friday, July 13, 2007
Tiger Tuesday
I was, while replying to a certain Shaun Oakes, Cape Town's favourite son, that I actually have not written here for a while. I am rejecting my very heart and soul, my readers! I love you all. Yes YOU...and YOU. And there are only two of you.
Anyway I was chilling the other day at Tiger, Tiger Tuesday. So I'm sitting at the bar(No...I was standing) and I see some dude next to me who looked remarkably like Bryan Habana, the guy who plays that sport. I think it's called rugby, maybe pronounced "Ugby" It might be a silent "R" It's a fairly new sport, where you basically run with a ball for an extended period of time, in order to touch the ball over a line and kick it through a pole.
Personally this is bullshit to me, and I doubt whether the sport will ever take off. I mean, imagine having an "Ugby" World Cup? Ludicrous!
So I asked this little mynx I was with if it was him. At this point I realised I looked remarkably girly, as I was asking a girl if that "dude" was Bryan Habana. Very bad for my image.
So then, and this is true, I start joking around going "Oh my GOD, it's Bryan Habana" and I was batting my eyelids and stuff. So this guy, who I thought was random, looks at me as though I have just had sex with a sheep. Anyway, I forget about him as I think he is some punk boy, until i realise what I have done the next morning.
I went onto this mynx's Facebook page, and saw the photos from the night. The random guy in question was Fourie du Preez! If that's how you spell it? I am a complete idiot.
So anyway, back to the bar story. Bryan Habana was ordering a Malibu and something I think, and he kept looking my way as though I must acknowledge him. I mean, I was pretty close to him, pretty much touching. I think maybe he was just nervous. But I was not going to go "Oh Bryan Habana right?" No. screw that. He was lucky to be in my enigmatic presence. He was clearly in awe of my power, looks, women mingling around me and so on and so forth.
Then I turned around, with my double vodka and Creme Soda(R10 I think, crazy) and I saw Rassie Erasmus. I'm not really too interested in him as he is not a real celeb like Becks. So I won't talk about him.
What I must mention is the girls we were with were crazy. Myself and Charlie V had to entertain 7 girls by ourselves, and obviously we did because we are just hilarious.
But by 1am I was so tired of seeing boobs, making girls laugh and just being awesome that I left.
I don't know why I just wrote this post, but I did.
Anyway, hopefully next week brings more intelligent stuff.
Take it easy
And if it's easy, take it home
Anyway I was chilling the other day at Tiger, Tiger Tuesday. So I'm sitting at the bar(No...I was standing) and I see some dude next to me who looked remarkably like Bryan Habana, the guy who plays that sport. I think it's called rugby, maybe pronounced "Ugby" It might be a silent "R" It's a fairly new sport, where you basically run with a ball for an extended period of time, in order to touch the ball over a line and kick it through a pole.
Personally this is bullshit to me, and I doubt whether the sport will ever take off. I mean, imagine having an "Ugby" World Cup? Ludicrous!
So I asked this little mynx I was with if it was him. At this point I realised I looked remarkably girly, as I was asking a girl if that "dude" was Bryan Habana. Very bad for my image.
So then, and this is true, I start joking around going "Oh my GOD, it's Bryan Habana" and I was batting my eyelids and stuff. So this guy, who I thought was random, looks at me as though I have just had sex with a sheep. Anyway, I forget about him as I think he is some punk boy, until i realise what I have done the next morning.
I went onto this mynx's Facebook page, and saw the photos from the night. The random guy in question was Fourie du Preez! If that's how you spell it? I am a complete idiot.
So anyway, back to the bar story. Bryan Habana was ordering a Malibu and something I think, and he kept looking my way as though I must acknowledge him. I mean, I was pretty close to him, pretty much touching. I think maybe he was just nervous. But I was not going to go "Oh Bryan Habana right?" No. screw that. He was lucky to be in my enigmatic presence. He was clearly in awe of my power, looks, women mingling around me and so on and so forth.
Then I turned around, with my double vodka and Creme Soda(R10 I think, crazy) and I saw Rassie Erasmus. I'm not really too interested in him as he is not a real celeb like Becks. So I won't talk about him.
What I must mention is the girls we were with were crazy. Myself and Charlie V had to entertain 7 girls by ourselves, and obviously we did because we are just hilarious.
But by 1am I was so tired of seeing boobs, making girls laugh and just being awesome that I left.
I don't know why I just wrote this post, but I did.
Anyway, hopefully next week brings more intelligent stuff.
Take it easy
And if it's easy, take it home
Monday, July 09, 2007
Sunset Tan- Hilarious
I can't believe I actually watched this last night- but I had to. Sunset Tan on E! Entertainment is the most pathetic show ever! It follows the antics of the people working at a place called sunset tan, I believe in L.A. Yesterday's show had a little kid coming in, probably about 13 years old, and her mom wanted her to get a tan for her class photos as she said the previous year she looked a little pale. Fook me! Are you serious? So they spend like $1300 on this girl, to get her tanned. That is the most pathetic thing I have ever heard of.
All the people going in and out of there are obviously tanning addicts, as many of them were various shades of orange. It's such a pathetic reality show, and I always hate it that I actually watch this shit. I'm shocked.
I am lucky however that I have this bronzed skin like Achilles of Troy all year round. It's one of the benefits of being a descendant of various Greek God's and Goddesses.
And this cut body
All the people going in and out of there are obviously tanning addicts, as many of them were various shades of orange. It's such a pathetic reality show, and I always hate it that I actually watch this shit. I'm shocked.
I am lucky however that I have this bronzed skin like Achilles of Troy all year round. It's one of the benefits of being a descendant of various Greek God's and Goddesses.
And this cut body
Zim is trashed
In news that was not really news breaking, we hear that Zimbabwe has collapsed. Well it's not surprising really consider the idiot who runs the place.
But Zimbabwe is an interesting case, because it is so messed up, so beyond repair, that it needs to start again. To me, I'm no political person, but what do you do about Zimbabwe? Everything has crashed. By the end of this week there will be no food and no fuel. Their money is worth nothing and they are the poorest millionaires on the planet. What Zimbabwe needs to do is start again. You need to pretend that Zimbabwe never existed and act as though that piece of the planet has just been discovered. There is no possible way to fix it and in essence, you need to let the place self destruct.
I think it's sad for all the people there, and it is the government who have caused all the people all their suffering. We see a place where there is literally no food. No fuel. There is nothing they can do about it. It is in disrepair and what is happening now is inevitable. It had to happen and it is now happening, and I guess we will just see what happens as the week goes on.
Saturday, July 07, 2007
Let's play
I was perusing, at my leisure, the website for Let's play as I had heard from a friend that they were wanting to get 1 million soccer balls from now until the 2010 World Cup. Basically, Let's play focuses on getting kids out and being active, in essence, getting out and playing. I think this is a fantastic idea, as kids are not getting out enough these days. Playing sports also allows them to focus their minds on something useful and socialises them. This keeps them(Well hopefully) off drugs and away from crime.
However, this campaign to raise 1 million soccer balls seems a bit odd. Apparently these balls are being collected to encourage "play" But why not do something more useful, like get donations and sponsors for soccer training clinics. This way our kids will have a chance at developing their skills and maybe even make careers out of sport one day. It will also help with soccer development in South Africa, as we will have a large group of young kids with the potential to be good players, if that is indeed what they want to do.
And where are these 1 million balls going? If we are just going to hand them out to kids, who are going to kick them on the street for a few weeks until they break, are we achieving anything?
It's just a thought really.
However, this campaign to raise 1 million soccer balls seems a bit odd. Apparently these balls are being collected to encourage "play" But why not do something more useful, like get donations and sponsors for soccer training clinics. This way our kids will have a chance at developing their skills and maybe even make careers out of sport one day. It will also help with soccer development in South Africa, as we will have a large group of young kids with the potential to be good players, if that is indeed what they want to do.
And where are these 1 million balls going? If we are just going to hand them out to kids, who are going to kick them on the street for a few weeks until they break, are we achieving anything?
It's just a thought really.
Friday, June 29, 2007
I am a genius
Last night we had a bit of a party at Tiger where I saw Lieschen Botes, the model. You might recall her from the Sports Illustrated swimwear edition. Or Google her. Anyway after bending it until after 2am, I hit Barcellos for a chicken burger where I also bought the GQ. I then went straight to the Victorias Secret section and saw our very own Alessandra Ambrosio.
I read further down in the article about her and it said that as a child she was insecure about her large ears and had them pinned back at age 11. I'm not joking. Buy the GQ. Realise that I found this flaw earlier.
Then praise me.
Then also be jealous that the photo above was taken on Clifton yesterday. It's winter here in Cape Town. And we still get the most awesome weather. Yes we do.
Life is good
Enjoy the weekend I can already tell it's Friday by the smell of cheap booze that permeates the air.
Take it easy
Tuesday, June 26, 2007
Interesting
Found THIS on The Cool Hunter.
Interesting.
I wonder how it affects your concentration on the road if you are going at speed?
Quite clever anyway.
Interesting.
I wonder how it affects your concentration on the road if you are going at speed?
Quite clever anyway.
Jonas Bendiksen: Satellites
This is quite an interesting looking book, and I saw this mentioned in GQ. Jonas Bendiksen travelled through the former USSR taking photographs and in Kazakhstan he found the wreckages of space rockets and he also found the people who salvage these rockets for scrap.
If you go to the website you will see two guys sitting on top of one of these rockets, with butterflies flying all around them. It really is one of the most awesome photographs I have ever seen. There you are out in the middle of nowhere and there are two guys sitting on a rocket that has fallen from the atmosphere.
And then there are the butterflies which give the photo an eerie feel, like something out of a movie. It's great because it's a photo you feel you have never ever seen. Probably because you never have seen something like this.
It makes a great change from the usual coffee table books and would be a great addition to liven up that old coffee table of yours.
Go HERE for more information on the book and how you can own it.
If you go to the website you will see two guys sitting on top of one of these rockets, with butterflies flying all around them. It really is one of the most awesome photographs I have ever seen. There you are out in the middle of nowhere and there are two guys sitting on a rocket that has fallen from the atmosphere.
And then there are the butterflies which give the photo an eerie feel, like something out of a movie. It's great because it's a photo you feel you have never ever seen. Probably because you never have seen something like this.
It makes a great change from the usual coffee table books and would be a great addition to liven up that old coffee table of yours.
Go HERE for more information on the book and how you can own it.
Sunday, June 24, 2007
The other half
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
I found the flaw
For years now I have told people that I WILL NOT marry, unless that marriage is to Gisele Bundchen. People know this. I always thought Gisele was the perfect person. Some people said her nose was too big, her eyes too this and that, but that all of her features put together made a pretty fine oil painting. Then people started coming to me with regards to a certain Alessandra Ambrosio.
For the past couple of weeks I have been studying her pictures in the June 2007 GQ (SA Edition) and had nearly come to the conclusion that I would marry her or Gisele. She was too beautiful. I never told anyone that I had a thing for her, as due to the circles I run in, she would probably find out and think I'm a fool for not letting her know. So I kept it quiet.
However, today I found it. Because I have many hours of leisure at my disposal, I read a lot. I was just reading through Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas again, and then turned my complete attention to studying these photos again. I wanted to prove everyone wrong.
Alessandra Ambrosio has a funny ear. I'm serious. This photo is from Google Image search and is the photo from GQ that I have in my hands. It may in fact be better to buy the GQ and hold the pictures close to you(Getting weird) Seriously, buy the GQ and have a close look at her ears. I know a friend who has this thing about feet(Mind you, I do too) So if a girl is smoking hot but has one odd toe, he will go off her. I don't have quite the same vibe with ears, especially not when they are attached to Alessandra.
However, I just thought I would make it clear that like Gisele(And her nose), Alessandra is not perfect. I also want to be credited as the person who first noticed this. I think I only saw it now as previously I had only been looking at her fantastic tits.
So I have found the flaw in the operating system that is Alessandra.
Mind you, if I were to be sitting in my hotel room at The Palms in Vegas, sipping on some gin and juice, and Alessandra had to walk up to me, naked, covered in oil, with a Mojito in her hand, and she said to me "Here Sean you SEXY FUCK(What happened there?), take a drink. And while you are at it, take me" Then, in this special situation, I would have to take her.
HOWEVER, this is the only situation I would have her in. In any other, less idyllic situation, I would definitely be put off by her ear.
Now click on the photo and study that ear.
But...I bet you still would.
Monday, June 18, 2007
Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas
I don't have much to write and so I thought maybe I would recommend something to read. The weather is not great and no one really works so it's good to watch DVD's and read stuff.
Like Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas by Hunter S Thompson- "A savage journey to the heart of the American dream"
It is about Hunter and his trip he took to Las Vegas to cover s car race. Anyway, you probably all know the story. He spends the money given to him by a magazine on drugs and gets completely out of shape. I love drug stories because they are so mad. Hunter spent his whole life being paid to cover things for magazines and in the process got completely off his head. He would do road trips and do drugs. It would seem that he was never in an office. He would drink beer while working, he was just living the life. And he knew lot's of people.
The book really is savage, but I enjoyed it and often find myself flipping to the front page where the first line reads:
We were somewhere around Barstow on the edge of the desert when the drugs began to take hold
Classic stuff. Buy it HERE, and have it delivered straight to your door, or office. Brilliant.
Like Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas by Hunter S Thompson- "A savage journey to the heart of the American dream"
It is about Hunter and his trip he took to Las Vegas to cover s car race. Anyway, you probably all know the story. He spends the money given to him by a magazine on drugs and gets completely out of shape. I love drug stories because they are so mad. Hunter spent his whole life being paid to cover things for magazines and in the process got completely off his head. He would do road trips and do drugs. It would seem that he was never in an office. He would drink beer while working, he was just living the life. And he knew lot's of people.
The book really is savage, but I enjoyed it and often find myself flipping to the front page where the first line reads:
We were somewhere around Barstow on the edge of the desert when the drugs began to take hold
Classic stuff. Buy it HERE, and have it delivered straight to your door, or office. Brilliant.
Monday, June 11, 2007
Black owned
I'm always intrigued at this whole thing in South Africa what with quotas and BEE and the like.
However I think we are pushing it now.
We are being stupid, and while I don't just accuse people of being racist, I think this borders on it.
I see on a packet of Blue Ribbon bread that it says "Premier Foods- Largest 100% black owned company in SA"
So therefore a white person will never be allowed to be a part owner of this company. Not that it really bothers me, but what would happen if I had to start up an empire, and then advertise on it "54 Empire- Largest white owned company in SA"
Do you not think there would be cries of racism?
Every company these days seems to be having to have a certain amount of black employees and white and so on.
So why can Premier Foods get away with being 100% black, and why must they declare this on their packaging? Is it really necessary to put this out there, on the packaging?
Intriguing
However I think we are pushing it now.
We are being stupid, and while I don't just accuse people of being racist, I think this borders on it.
I see on a packet of Blue Ribbon bread that it says "Premier Foods- Largest 100% black owned company in SA"
So therefore a white person will never be allowed to be a part owner of this company. Not that it really bothers me, but what would happen if I had to start up an empire, and then advertise on it "54 Empire- Largest white owned company in SA"
Do you not think there would be cries of racism?
Every company these days seems to be having to have a certain amount of black employees and white and so on.
So why can Premier Foods get away with being 100% black, and why must they declare this on their packaging? Is it really necessary to put this out there, on the packaging?
Intriguing
Wednesday, June 06, 2007
Hardest man on the planet
I had always believed that Mike Horn was the hardest man on the planet.
Until I read the April 2007 issue of GQ and found out about Dean Karnazes. 50 marathons in 50 consecutive days. 563 kilometres without sleeping over three days. We have found the bionic man.
I managed to find the exact GQ article, which they had re-used, right over HERE.
Read it. Marvel at it. Ask "How?"
How can this stuff be possible?
Until I read the April 2007 issue of GQ and found out about Dean Karnazes. 50 marathons in 50 consecutive days. 563 kilometres without sleeping over three days. We have found the bionic man.
I managed to find the exact GQ article, which they had re-used, right over HERE.
Read it. Marvel at it. Ask "How?"
How can this stuff be possible?
Tuesday, June 05, 2007
Warning: Idol ahead
I have just been shocked whilst watching Prison Break. M-Net are now telling me that they are on their fourth season of Idols.
Fuck
What ever happened to our so called "Idols" Where is Anke? And Karin? Heinz still kicks it about for the simple reason that he is the entire package. He is easy on the eye. He has a voice. Do you think Britney Spears would have done as well as she did if she looked like Rosie O' Donnell? No, I don't think she would have. The voice is only a part of the idol.
It's no offence to anyone, but the fact is that people want an idol who is hot, good looking, a belter, whatever you will call it. It's what is in demand.
Let's not stuff it up again this time boys.
Fuck
What ever happened to our so called "Idols" Where is Anke? And Karin? Heinz still kicks it about for the simple reason that he is the entire package. He is easy on the eye. He has a voice. Do you think Britney Spears would have done as well as she did if she looked like Rosie O' Donnell? No, I don't think she would have. The voice is only a part of the idol.
It's no offence to anyone, but the fact is that people want an idol who is hot, good looking, a belter, whatever you will call it. It's what is in demand.
Let's not stuff it up again this time boys.
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